Giving up control to gain success


How often do you get exactly what you want, in exactly the way you want to get it? Really…how often?

If you are anything like the rest of the world, things rarely turn out exactly how you planned. Nevertheless, you spend hours and hours trying to control how things will work out, crafting a plan for every area of your life. Maybe you have a life plan that includes marriage by a certain age and kids a specific number of years after the wedding. Maybe you have a business plan that meticulously details exactly how many clients you are going to get this year and exactly how you are going to get them.

You follow your plan with precise steps, ensuring the outcome will be exactly the way you expect.

Except it’s not what you expected. It rarely is.

When you hold tightly to your blueprint, you become single minded and rarely look up, let alone sideways, to see what might be happening around you. You miss out on shifting market forces, changes in technology, and other things that will effect how your plan plays out. When you are afraid to let go, to leave questions unanswered, or to ask different questions,  you may find yourself missing the very opportunity you have been waiting for.

Keeping your eye on the prize is fine, but you have to look around once in a while as well.

What if you decide to let go, just a little bit, and relinquish some control? What if you allow for the possibility that things might not go the way you planned? What if you accept the idea that your goals might be achieved through other means?

Plans are important and I believe knowing where you want to go is key to actually getting there. That said, it’s equally as important to be flexible in the planning process and to allow yourself the room to adjust as necessary and explore as desired.

Rather than doggedly following one path, control what you can and allow the rest to happen fluidly and organically, leaving room for both what you think will happen and the opportunity for it to happen differently.

Why not try these things:

  • nurture yourself with good, healthy food
  • move your body each day (this not only helps with your health, but also your creativity)
  • rest each night
  • surround yourself with good people – the kind of people that will be supportive and honest with you
  • offer support to others without expectation of reward
  • ask for help when the answers aren’t obvious
  • listen before speaking
  • read a book that challenges what you believe
  • write something everyday – you don’t have to share it, just write
  • reach out to new people and introduce yourself
  • give someone a compliment
  • understand that it’s when things are hardest that growth happens

Make a plan, have goals and targets, and reach for them. But open yourself to the possibility that things might not work exactly how you expect them to.

When you let go, you may end up with more than you ever dreamed possible